Zombie Apocalypse Part 1: Escaping

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Ok, so watching far too many zombie films and shows may have fuelled this blog. I think the push over the edge is my not so secret obsession with Bear Grylls. These combined have created a delusion that I am now an expert at surviving what is the inevitable. In reality I’d probably huddle in a corner, rocking back and forth with my childhood teddy Samantha and cry. Still I care about people and the thought of anyone not being prepared makes me sad. Please take this with a pinch of salt as this isn’t a definitive guide, more something to maul over with a cup of tea (or coffee if your that way inclined…weird coffee drinkers…more on that later). If you believe I’ve missed something out that you think is important let me know, as I’m always improving on my plan.

Ask anyone one of my generation and the vast majority will tell you that not only do they have a plan in place (vague or solid), they also have a rough idea of what items to take for survival. I’m obviously talking about when the inevitable zombie apocalypse happens of course…I think the title might have given it away.  I won’t go into full detail as that would take up far too much of your time. Safe to say a few important things for you to consider.

What is your escape route? Most of us live in small or major cities. You really will want to evacuate these areas as a dense population will not only attract but help create more zombies. Where is your end destination? Or are you planning on being nomadic? Either way you need to have a place in mind to get to. Once you have decided where your ‘fallback’ is you need to look at where your house is situated. Are you the top flat of a five storey block, or living in a ground floor house? You need to look at all the possible exits from your accommodation as you might find the first choice of escape swarming with the undead. Now consider the street your house is located on. Are you surrounded by lots of little alleys? Or are you on a main road? Think about where the potential congestion points would be and the alternate routes to get around them. Remember you won’t be the only person trying to escape, so that nice ‘secret’ alley you know might become overrun with zombies thanks to some idiot who thinks they can take the world on with a cricket bat (Shaun of the Dead reference in case you where wondering). Repeat this process until you have a clear idea in your mind of getting from the place you reside to your chosen ‘fallback’. Using vehicles always gives you an advantage but they are noisy, likely to break and other humans will try to take them off you.

What are your ideas on escaping, would you or are you the type of person to try and hold up at home? Let me know by commenting.

On a side note I hope you all had a good easter. The Easter Bunny didn’t give me any eggs AGAIN, so I managed to set a little trap that placed a tracking device on to him. With this in place I managed to track him to his lair and raid it for a few eggs. Don’t worry folks I’m sure he’ll be around next year…that’s if he figures out how to undo the chains whilst holding his breath underwater…I kid of course…or am I…Mwhahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Till next time citizens.

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2 thoughts on “Zombie Apocalypse Part 1: Escaping

  1. We’re heading out to woods. In my mind, I can hunt for food. Have never actually put this to the test, but I seem convinced that it’s a possible skill that’s going to miraculously emerge. I’m trying to raise my kids so they’re better prepared (my parents were woefully unconcerned with zombie apocalypses…)

  2. Pingback: In case of Armageddon… « The Sleepless Blog

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